Creating opportunities to be great
We don’t have control of what happens to us, but how we respond defines our lives.
You have to surf. You can’t predict the waves. You got to deal with the ones you have.
Jensen Huang, CEO Nvidia
Fighting for control is a losing battle.
No matter how hard we try or how many variables we remove, we cannot control what happens to us.
We can (and should) plan how we want to navigate our lives, but as soon as we take our perfectly crafted plan into the real world, the unpredictability of everyday life will thwart any chance of executing it as we expected.
How we deal with this lack of control determines how we feel about our lives and what we can accomplish.
Thriving in the ocean
When we realize we don’t have control, it’s easy to give up entirely. If life is going to knock us down no matter how hard we try, what’s the point of trying at all?
Apathy and nihilism are logical but dangerous responses to the lack of control we have in the world, but perfectionism is equally as damaging. Obsessing over things we can’t control leads to chronic stress and disappointment.
Navigating the world is a lot like navigating the ocean. It’s unpredictable and dangerous, but there are patterns and best practices that make a huge difference. They don’t let us control the water, but they let us swim without drowning.
Trying to control the ocean leads to over-exhaustion and drowning. Giving up means we’ll float out to sea.
To thrive in the ocean, we need to accept and respect what happens to us while maintaining control of how we respond.
We have to surf
No one embodies this combination of personal responsibility and acceptance better than surfers.
Surfers do not try to overpower the ocean or sit around letting the current take them.
They meticulously observe their surroundings and diligently paddle themselves into the right place at the right time so they can ride the waves the ocean gives them.
Surfing is not exerting control over the ocean or passively waiting for waves to come. It’s a deliberate and focused effort to find the best position to take advantage of something that’s completely out of our control.
This is how we should navigate our lives. We have to surf. We can’t control what happens to us, but we can’t give up.
Instead, we need to put ourselves in the best position to take advantage of the opportunities that come our way.
Some days, the waves will be small. Others, they’ll be huge. Some days, we’ll be the only ones out there catching all the waves for ourselves. Others, it will be so crowded we can’t even catch one. Some days, we’ll get pounded into the sand over and over again. Others, we’ll effortlessly glide across the waves.
We’ll never be able to control what happens to us, but we can control the position we put ourselves in.
Life is random and uncontrollable, but the more effort we spend on putting ourselves in the right position, the more opportunities we’ll have to do something great.
Prompts
Are you more likely to give up or try to control everything? What are the consequences of this?
What’s something outside of your control that’s been frustrating you? How can you focus on putting yourself in a better position instead of trying to take control?
What does surfing through life mean to you?
Deep Dive
An investigation of things that thrive in chaos and uncertainty.
Thanks for reading! I’ll see you next Sunday.
Kevin