What we see depends on who we are
Our perception of reality is far from the truth.
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.
Anaïs Nin
We do not live in an objective reality. Instead, we live in our perception of reality.
The perceived reality we experience informs our decisions, shapes our feelings about our lives, and influences how we act towards others and the world around us.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with making all of our decisions based on our perception of reality (it’s the only choice we have), but we need to recognize that our perception of reality is vastly different from the objective truth.
We will never be able to process everything about every situation. When we’re missing information about something, our brains don’t operate with missing variables; they make things up to fill in the gaps. The less information we have about something, the more our brain fills in the gaps on its own, and the more distorted our perception of reality becomes.
Perpetuating the past
The information our brains create to fill in the gaps of our perception is colored by our past.
When a stranger approaches a dog who grew up in a loving family, it wags its tail and welcomes the incoming affection. When a stranger approaches a dog who was abused as a puppy, it whimpers and runs away.
Our assumptions and perceptions are influenced by our past in the same way.
When we’re missing critical information, we make it up, and the information we create is heavily influenced by our past experiences.
Without an awareness of this brain quirk, our perception of reality will become increasingly farther from the truth, and we’ll continually perpetuate the experiences and opinions of our past.
Accepting a flawed reality
In our everyday lives, we need to remember that we can only see 20% of true objective reality. That means 80% of our perceived reality is entirely made up by our brains and heavily influenced by our pasts.
We should always be searching for more objective information to make better decisions, but we should also own the fact that our brains are making up a lot of what we think is real. If we remember this and how much past experiences are influencing our perception, we can operate from a perception of reality that is closer to the truth.
There isn’t anything we can do to fix our flawed perception, but once we accept it, we can use the information the same way a sailboat uses the wind. A sailboat is not a passive vessel forced to travel in whatever direction the wind is moving. Instead, uses the wind to travel in the direction of its destination regardless of where the wind is coming from.
We need to consider our flawed perceptions in the same way. They should not be what steers our decision-making and behavior. Instead, we should recognize how our thinking is flawed and use that understanding to move ourselves closer to the person we want to become.
Prompts
In which area of your life are you most likely to make decisions with missing information?
How does your past influence the way you perceive reality?
What direction would you like your life to travel? Is your perception of life hurting or helping you travel in that direction?
Deep Dive
Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman
Explores how our brains make intuitive assumptions and flawed decisions based on cognitive biases.
Thanks for reading! I’ll see you next Sunday.
Kevin