Stop Fighting Manufactured Hardships
If we expand our perspective we can find space for more gratitude.
We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.
Seneca
The things we complain about when times are good are the same things we wish we had back when times are bad.
A bad job or an annoying boss are nothing compared to losing a job altogether.
A corrupt or misguided political system is light years better than civil unrest.
Arguing with a spouse or loved one is incomparable to losing someone altogether.
Most of us enjoy peace and stability in our lives, but there are places in the world today engaged in brutal and chaotic wars, causing unthinkable anguish and instability to millions of people.
It’s amazing how quickly we would take back our current annoying and inconvenient circumstances after a bomb was dropped on our neighborhood.
Someone will always have it better than us, and someone will always have it worse than us. We’ll drive ourselves crazy if we focus too much on one cohort or the other, but it’s important to keep both extremes in mind as we go about our everyday lives.
Manufactured Hardship
In our cushy modern world, it’s easy to lose sight of how fortunate we are. It’s often said that “hard times create strong men. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. And, weak men create hard times”.
If this is true, it feels like today’s good times are making us weak.
Without real hardship in our lives, we create it. Instead of being grateful and conscious of how lucky we are, we create new problems to complain and argue about.
We get mad when we have to pay for shipping or wait in line, and argue with friends and family about manufactured and inconsequential issues.
We’re making ourselves miserable while living in conditions that so many others would give anything for.
Finding Gratitude from Perspective
This isn’t to say our daily problems and frustrations are irrelevant. The hardest thing someone has ever experienced is still the hardest thing they’ve ever experienced, regardless of what it is. These issues feel real and trigger the same reactions in our minds as more serious hardships.
Because manufactured hardships feel the same as real ones, we should spend more time reflecting and contextualizing the situations we find ourselves in.
If we’re stressed because our boss is overbearing or if we’re stressed because we we’re struggling to put food on the table, we should temper our reactions differently.
That said, we shouldn’t be complacent if we happen to find ourselves in fortunate circumstances. We can still be frustrated and stressed, and work to improve our lives at the same time. We just need to do so with a historical and global context of what real problems look like.
If we’re grateful first, then many of our typical problems will fall away. With a clear perspective, we can enjoy our day-to-day experience instead of searching for reasons to be unhappy.
Prompts
Thinking with a global context, what do you have to be grateful for?
What manufactured hardships are causing stress in your everyday life?
What does being grateful first look like in your life?
Deep Dive
Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl
A powerful testament to finding purpose and gratitude even in the darkest circumstances.
Thanks for reading! I’ll see you next Sunday.
Kevin
Great one!