100 Weeks of Becoming a Bit Better Each Day

A framework for organizing your life and overcoming challenges

Dec 04, 2023

It’s the first week of December, which means two things: Christmas is around the corner and so is Prompted’s two-year anniversary. It also means this is the 100th edition of Prompted.

I want to use this milestone as an excuse to look back on the common themes I’ve noticed from the previous 99 ideas and 297 prompts I’ve sent out.

And I’d like to take a moment to say thank you. Whether you’ve reached out to share your thoughts, read the newsletter every week, or simply drop by every once in a while, I can’t express how much I appreciate your time and attention.

Sharing this newsletter with hundreds of people who are all trying to become a bit better is a privilege that I’m grateful for every day.

Kevin

white and black 10 signage — Photo by Marcel Eberle on Unsplash

You make the world a better place by making daily improvements to become the best version of yourself.

Roy T. Bennett

For nearly two years, I’ve published a new idea every week about becoming a bit better each day.

After reading lots of books, listening to thousands of hours of podcasts, writing about one hundred different ideas, and testing it all in my own life, I’ve adopted a helpful framework for organizing my life and identified three lessons that make it easier to overcome the most common challenges life throws at us.

The framework that helps me feel in control of life and gives me the confidence that I am moving in the right direction breaks down our lives into three layers: key areas of life are at the top, worthwhile pursuits within each area are in the middle, and daily actions within each of those pursuits are at the bottom.

Layered Life: Focus, Pursuit, Action

Defining the key areas of our lives lets us start with the big picture and keeps us focused on a small number (3-6) of things that are important to us. It diversifies our efforts enough that if we fail or experience hardship in any area of life, it doesn’t damage our sense of self because there are other important areas of our lives we’re focused on.

The worthwhile pursuits within each area of our lives help us concentrate our efforts on specific and measurable outcomes. Focusing on “family” or “work” is ambiguous and difficult to take action on. Focusing on having more honest conversations in our relationships or getting promoted by the end of the year makes it easier to take action and measure progress.

With these areas of focus and specific pursuits defined, we have the clarity to know what weekly and daily actions we need to take to make progress in each of our worthwhile pursuits. This makes it easy to know what we need to do each day and reassures us that we are working on what’s important even if it doesn’t feel like we’re making any progress.

This layered framework can help us stay organized and motivated, but we’ll never be able to avoid inevitable roadblocks, frustrations, and doubts. However, there are a few lessons that seem universally helpful regardless of the type of challenge.

The Evolutionary Mismatch

The most common challenge we experience is what neuroscientist Stephen Guyenet calls the Evolutionary Mismatch. Put simply, we evolved when everything was scarce, but now we have everything in abundance.

We are always in an uphill battle fighting against the temptations of algorithms, processed foods, endless dopamine-inducing content, and every other modern pleasure. No matter how much discipline or motivation we have, these mismatched temptations will always be an unfair fight.

Learning to avoid these temptations, and giving ourselves grace when we succumb to them, are lessons that save lots of anguish and guilt.

Moderation

Another challenge that is common across all different types of pursuits is the all-or-nothing paradox.

It’s typical to lean into extremes when things don’t go exactly as we plan. If we overeat at lunch, we’re prone to giving up on our diet altogether. If we miss a workout, we’re likely to give up on the rest of the week. If we’re not the best at something, we give up.

Whether it’s trying to do more of something worthwhile or less of something detrimental, the lessons of moderation will steer us in the right direction.

Aristotle wrote about the balance of extremes thousands of years ago and the same wisdom exists in the cliches of the 21st century (“everything in moderation”). The right answer or approach never lies in the extremes. The best approach is always the middle ground.

Seasonality

The last lesson for overcoming challenges that has come up over and over again is the value of seasonality.

No matter how hard we try, we can never manufacture a perfectly balanced life in which our time is split evenly between each area of life every day. Although balance is a virtue, thinking about it on a time scale that’s too small creates more harm than good.

There are many things in our lives we can’t control, and this makes it impossible to work on every important thing every day. This is frustrating because when things are busy in one area of life it diminishes our efforts in others and it feels like they’re getting left behind.

In the short term, our efforts in the neglected areas of life will fall behind, but if we think on a longer time horizon, we can find balance in all areas of our lives by embracing seasonality.

If we zoom out, we can see each season of life is not forever, and plan to focus on different pursuits in different seasons of life. This lets us balance our focus in the long term and enjoy each season of life in the moment.

The more I think about becoming a bit better each day, the more I’m inclined to believe that the only thing that truly matters is the work.

The systems, beliefs, and strategies don’t mean anything if we can’t bring ourselves to roll up our sleeves and take action that moves us forward.

But, it is those systems, beliefs, and strategies that help us clarify what is important and what actions we need to take to move us closer to where we’d like to be.

Ultimately, the choice is up to us. The resources and opportunities are out there, but they don’t come easy.

If we want to become a bit better each day, we have to be clear on what is important to us, take consistent action to move us in the right direction, and constantly overcome challenges and doubts along the way.

Prompts

What does one “layer” of your life look like?
1. Define an area of life that is important, a worthwhile pursuit within that area of life, and daily action that will move you forward within that pursuit.
What challenge do you experience the most when trying to move your life forward?
Are you taking consistent action to move your life forward?